detached observations
The compiler, like the magician, speaks in symbols only the initiated can read.
This essay was originally published on smolnero.com, where all pieces from the Earthly Communications series are first shared.
We’re quick to name the copier and the copied—was it stolen, or not? What’s the lineage of the stoles? Does it matter? I don’t believe so. That obsession distracts us from a deeper inheritance: a genetic history of outside communication—conversations that allow trauma to progress.
Each trauma represents an abstract tree syntax. Implementing level-order traversal is a method that must be done by oneself in order to utilize trauma as internal value. For most of us with a social media account—or any living human who willingly owns an iPhone or Android device—overconsumption of data is a leading cause of motor depletion. This overflow is common in many areas of the everyday psyche. In regard to trauma—whether connected to childhood abuse, strict implementations of foreign ideologies, or the commonplace workplace—a simple approach might be to address it in phases.
Reflection can be considered as creating a queue: an empty queue, if you will, that is only truly empty once one has prepared the space to observe trauma without judgment. This leads to picking a starting point—a memory, a recurring thought, a behavior traced back to something earlier.
That r00t might not even be traumatic in a dramatic sense. It could be subtle: a phrase someone said, a repeated insecurity, a pattern that keeps showing up.
How do we propose to interpret that?
You gotta be braver to understand—emotional bribes aren’t always a bad thing. Our bodies inherently trick us into establishing better alert systems. Overflow must be considered in all scenarios—and a pros-and-cons mindset can really cause one to shoot themselves in the foot.
Prioritize getting to a space where you can traverse layered pros—because before anything can be processed, it must first be enqueued.
This is where we begin: the loading of memory, where meaning is pulled from abstraction just long enough to be seen.
The Enqueue Phase.